


You are my home (let me be yours too)

by sunshine_kitcat (moonkevin)



Series: The story of my life (told in the tune of yours) [7]
Category: NCT (Band)
Genre: Comfort, Fluff, Hurt/Comfort, Lee Taeyong-centric, Memories, Multi, OT21 (NCT), Platonic Relationships, Team as Family, basically taeyong gets gifts and feels loved, except there's no hurt
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-09-08
Updated: 2019-09-08
Packaged: 2020-10-12 03:57:23
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,088
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/20557853
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/moonkevin/pseuds/sunshine_kitcat
Summary: There’s a crack of light in Taeyong’s vision. The bed squeaks a little as he tries to sit up, and the empty silent room greets him. The memory of the words ‘day off’ echoes on his mind, but the residues of post-tour exhaustion hits him like a freight truck. With two squinted eyes and the smell of loneliness in his skin, Taeyong props himself up. Then, he sees it.An assortment of items everywhere, decorating the dim room. Light moonlight trickle past the curtains and the clock reads 4 am. A bunch of sticky notes litter the items, all reading something different.The pounding headache in his brain settles for now, as if to tell Taeyong to find comfort.He picks up the first item up, a scrawl of “From Taeil” on its side. Then, he caresses the message in his bony hand.





	You are my home (let me be yours too)

**Author's Note:**

> It's On Us - AJR

There’s a crack of light in Taeyong’s vision. The bed squeaks a little as he tries to sit up, and the empty silent room greets him. The memory of the words ‘day off’ echoes on his mind, but the residues of post-tour exhaustion hits him like a freight truck. With two squinted eyes and the smell of loneliness in his skin, Taeyong props himself up. Then, he sees it.

An assortment of items everywhere, decorating the dim room. Light moonlight trickle past the curtains and the clock reads 4 am. A bunch of sticky notes litter the items, all reading something different.

The pounding headache in his brain settles for now, as if to tell Taeyong to find comfort.

He picks up the first item up, a scrawl of “From Taeil” on its side. Then, he caresses the message in his bony hand.

_ Nobody knows what you're going through _

_ So you just be you, and I'll be that, too _

There’s an old photo under the note, and Taeyong sucks in a breath when he sees it. It’s him, 15 years old and still bright-eyed. His sister has an arm around him, smile reminding Taeyong of a childhood told in stolen midnight snacks and water gunfights. He remembers how Taeil collected photos from everyone’s past, neatly tucked in a scrapbook. Taeil made home a little less far, no matter how close to the company Taeyong lived.

“I know we’re not the same, but you are family Yongie. My door is always open, and I promise I don’t bite.”

_ No one should know if you bleed red or blue _

_ You just bleed you, and I'll sit with you _

The second item was from Johnny. A pack of bandaids and medicine, neatly tucked in an ornate box. The box was wooden, and its weathered shell reminds Taeyong of trainee days. He remembers Johnny bringing Taeyong to ER after the latter overworked himself. The American had spent three hours there, falling asleep on a hard hospital chair instead of Taeyong’s out-of-town family. He felt like family.

“Try not to get hurt Yongie~ I’m not always there to patch you up.”

_ It's not your fault you don't feel safe _

_ It's not your fault so don't take blame _

_ (No, it's on us) _

Taeyong knew the next item was from Yuta the moment he picked it up. A blanket, decorated with an assortment of cats. There’s a faint smell of a musty scent on it, and Taeyong recalls the blanket he and Yuta used to fight for when they were roommates. It was the only one warm enough in the winter, and they ended up sharing it on colder nights. Memories of an unconventional friendship blooming under the thick fabric and squished bodies.

“Let’s hang out again, just the two of us, okay?”

_ It's not your fault you don't feel safe _

_ It's not your fault so don't take blame _

_ (No, it's on us) _

The next gift took Taeyong by surprise. NCT‘s only other leader, a bottle of powdered hot cocoa, and a canister to hold warmth. Taeyong remembers talking before Kun debuted, somewhere on the roof of the company, overlooking the city. A cold winter breeze hid their worries and insecurities, the comfort of switching to hyung in the middle of the snowy roof. Kun looked so much more prepared than Taeyong, yet deep down he knew they were the same. Leaders learn to put on a mask, after all.

“It’s getting colder. Please take care of yourself, Taeyong-hyung.”

_ We can try together _

_ Make it right together _

_ We can fight together _

_ It's on us _

Doyoung’s gift reminded Taeyong of his weariness. A soft pillow, infused with a scent of summer lavender. A reminder, of sorts, that Taeyong is allowed to feel lonely. Doyoung always felt too mature for his age, and Taeyong feels prickling tears at the corner of his eyes. His studio comes to mind, hard floor and uncomfortable couch cushion. Doyoung has taken one look at it and Taeyong found the studio transformed the next day. It was filled with comfortable throw pillows, a better chair and a new lamp. Doyoung had been silent, but Taeyong just knew. 

“You can’t work when your tired hyung. Take a nap every now and then.”

_ Though your trust is stolen _

_ Though your heart is broken _

_ You are never broken _

_ It's on us _

_ Know that it's on us _

A portion of cheesecake greets Taeyong next. Ten’s cheeky grin seems to radiate off the delicious treat, so Taeyong smiles at it. He remembers when they were in Ukraine, jet-lagged and exhausted. He remembers waking up in the middle of the night regretting skipping dinner, just to find a tray of semi-cold food beside his bed. Ten was long asleep on the other hotel bed, but actions are worth a million words. It seemed Ten knew Taeyong would rather be alone for one meal. 

“A sweet tooth can only stay sweet if you feed it!”

_ I wonder where, where your mind goes _

_ Come out of the cold, we'll take the load _

The next gift was confusing, yet it made perfect sense. A packet of gum, except, it was decorated with old photos from trainee days. Taeyong remembers taking a bunch of the teenage members out on a grocery errand in the middle of the night. Jaehyun, Jungwoo, Mark and Sicheng, debating over which type of gum was the best. In the end, they bought all four types, and Taeyong was forced to taste test everyone and give his preference. He had picked Sicheng’s in the end, but it was more out of endearment for the Chinese boy than actual preferences.

“You’re allowed to not be fair hyung. You’re only human.”

_ And if they hurt you with words so cruel _

_ Here's what we'll do, we'll all fight for you _

Taeyong wonders why everyone did this during the next gift. Sicheng and Lucas combined efforts and gave him a PS4 controller. He remembers the entirety of NCT, squished in the tiny living room of the 127 dorms. The annual Mario Kart tournament, where friendships were made and fake-broken. Screams of fear and disbelief when a red shell comes zooming on the screen fills the memories, yet laughter and happiness made the memory real.

“Let’s play again soon! The 2019 cup needs a champion!”

_ It's not your fault you don't feel safe _

_ It's not your fault so don't take blame _

_ (No, it's on us) _

Jungwoo’s gift draws a laugh from Taeyong. A large flipbook, obviously custom ordered, but meaningful nonetheless. A series of pencil on paper tells an adorable story of two boys who just wanted a hug. Memories of Jungwoo’s cute smile and enthusiasm on hugs domes to mind and Taeyong wants to hold the younger boy for eternity in gratitude. A cold breeze ruffles the curtains, and Taeyong suddenly misses the warmth of 9 boys huddled together. He makes a note to give Jungwoo an extra big hug in the morning.

“Hugs can create happiness. You deserve to be the happiest hyung I know.”

_ It's not your fault you don't feel safe _

_ It's not your fault so don't take blame _

_ (No, it's on us) _

The spiral notebook in Taeyong’s hands is covered in cheesy stickers, and the cartoonish fountain pen that came with it fitted perfectly. Mark and Xiaojun had probably spent hours finding the most ridiculous set they could, and Taeyong feels happier at the thought of the two near-strangers spending time together. He wonders if any of the other members had anything to do with that combination, but for now, Taeyong is exceptionally ecstatic at his rather large extended family getting along.

“We all grew up too fast, but hyung especially. It’s okay to be a little childish hyung.”

_ We can try together _

_ Make it right together _

_ We can fight together _

_ It's on us _

A scrapbook greets Taeyong next. It’s filled to the brim with photos of everyone in every state. He laughs at the ‘Drunk’ section and feels trickling tears at the ‘Debut’ section. Yangyang’s scrawled notes in the margin make the memories hilarious. Renjun’s doodles are on everyone’s faces, and Taeyong stifles a giggle at himself on the pages. Blank pages greet him after the already filled sections, and Taeyong finds the note there.

“Let’s keep making amazing memories altogether, okay hyung?”

_ Though your trust is stolen _

_ Though your heart is broken _

_ You are never broken _

_ It's on us _

_ Know that it's on us _

Jeno gives Taeyong a box of chips. He vaguely recalls being mildly addicted to them in trainee days, ignoring Doyoung’s scowl. He remembers giving Jeno a few during a late-night practise once, under the promise of not telling Doyoung. Flickering practice room lights were their only witnesses, and the pair practiced until dawn. It’s not healthy, it’s unorthodox and wrong for Taeyong to let Jeno do it, but Rookies' concert was coming up. That was the first time Jeno broke a rule.

“I barely see you nowadays hyung :( I hope that changes soon!”

_ It's not your fault you don't feel safe _

_ It's not your fault so don't take the blame _

_ (It's on us, it's on us) _

A box of coffee beans is his next gift. There’s a cute little sun drawn on the lid, and Taeyong chuckles at Donghyuck’s gift. He remembers giving the younger coffee for the first time, more sugar and milk than actual coffee. Impossibly light, yet Donghyuck absolutely loved it. He remembers how buzzed the younger was that day, and how Johnny asked him where his favourite coffee mug went. Taeyong knows coffee had nothing to do with either, and Donghyuck to do with both. Donghyuck was better than any coffee.

“I can drink one whole shot now hyung! Come to the cafe with me!”

_ We know what we need to do _

_ So we'll be there, it's not on you _

_ (It's on us, it's on us) _

Hilariously, Jaemin gave Taeyong a box of tea right under Donghyuck’s coffee. A packet of every flavour, with some version of cherry in all of them. He remembers Jaemin and his extreme taste in food and chuckles at the memory of Jaemin making a face at the toned down flavour of the tea. Five spoons of sugar were added to his portion, and Taeyong had been quite concerned that day. 

“I don’t see the appeal, but Kun-hyung said it relaxes the mind and body so I think it’s perfect for you, hyung.”

_ We can try together _

_ Make it right together _

_ We can fight together _

_ It's on us _

The next gift did not have a sticky note attached to it. In reality, it was a notebook of sticky notes. Taeyong recognizes Chenle and Kunhang’s handwriting on the stickies, one encouragement after every reassurance. He remembers the pair, so confident on the outside, yet so insecure on the inside. Taeyong notes to talk to both more. He chuckles at the memory of Chenle gawking at him for every movement he does on stage. 

“You’ll run out of compliments at the rate you’re going hyung. Here’s a few for you in return.”

_ Though your trust is stolen _

_ Though your heart is broken _

_ You are never broken _

_ It's on us _

_ Know that it's on us _

“Hyung?”

Taeyong looks up from his last gift. Jisung stands at the doorframe, hands behind his back. Smiling, Taeyong beckons him in.

“Why are you up at this hour?” Jisung shrinks, looking sheepish.

“Was making your gift. Taeil hyung told us you looked tired lately.” Taeyong frowns. Has he been worrying his members? It’s true that he felt tired, but idols generally feel that constantly. Sighing, he pats his bed and lets Jisung sit down next to him. The younger was so tall, taller than Taeyong himself and the elder male chuckles internally at the memory of little Jisung. A baby chick, they called him. He looked so much older now.

“What do you have for me?” Taeyong asks finally. Jisung slowly brings the present out from behind his back. The room feels warmer than ever, as Taeyong holds the gift gingerly in his hand.

“For you hyung.” Jisung smiles.

It was a little locket, golden with a silver chain attached. The picture inside was Taeyong the day he debuted. He notices the same chain around Jisung’s neck.

“Everyone has one now. Rings are overused nowadays.” Jisung explains, and Taeyong feels his eyes watering.

“Thank you.” He breathes finally. Wrapping Jisung in a bear hug, Taeyong tackles them both onto the bed.

  
  


Taeyong wants to thank them all for an eternity.


End file.
